I’ve been watching a lot of HGTV since coming to LA. My favorite shows are House Hunters and House Hunters International. There’s also another show I like to watch called For Rent, but only because it makes me angry.
When it comes to apartments/homes, I think living in New York for the past eleven years has made me bitter because there was this whiny broad on For Rent a few nights ago who was looking at a huge place—A HUGE PLACE—and was like, “There’s no place for a dining room table…”
B*TCH, YOU’RE LUCKY TO GET A KITCHEN IN NEW YORK.
I hated her.
Now there’s some stupid lady on House Hunters who wants a townhouse with a fireplace that she can turn on with a light switch. IT HAS TO BE A LIGHT SWITCH because she doesn’t want to bend down and flip a switch on the floor.
WHO DO THESE PEOPLE THINK THEY ARE?
Anyway, I know my LA update is WAY overdue (and truth be told I wrote a long one last week but for some reason it didn’t save so I lost the whole thing and I was so angry that I just said, “Ah, f*ck it,” and closed the computer instead of rewriting) but to give you a quick update, I AM SO HAPPY HERE. I MEAN, I’M REALLY, REALLY HAPPY. And I think living here and watching HGTV—both of these things combined—has made me realize that New York was just beating me down. I mean, the fireplace lady—yes, she’s an idiot. But there’s nothing wrong with wanting a dining room table. Why did I get so mad at that lady?
Since being here, at least once a day I ask myself why I have lived in New York for so long. (It’s like I had Stockholm Syndrome or something.) CALIFORNIA IS AWESOME. It’s like the promised land. It’s sunny all the time and there are birds and flowers everywhere. I have space out here. I have a sofa on the patio out here. I HAVE A SOFA OUTSIDE. I haven’t seen one rat since I’ve been here. But hummingbirds? THEY ZIP BY MY HEAD EVERY DAY. I am so happy.
I’m supposed to go back to New York in November, but truth be told, I’m not sure I will.